simulacrum of life

i've got an idiot for a neighbour, who is sooo bored with life that he insists on knocking on my door to disturb me 24/7... and he does it to my other friends who are also staying in the same building. more about idiot neighbour in another post, but for the purposes of this post, what i've said is enough. to escape from him, we decided to go to the supermarket about 7 min walk away at 11pm.

so there we are, the 3 of us, D, C and me strolling up and down the aisle seeing if there's anything we want to get. finally i find some parmesan cheese (for risotto... recipe to follow soon) and then we slowly make our way to the check out counter... as we pass by an aisle, we meet an acquaintance from uni, P. so there we are chatting away and then out of the blue this supermarket staff approaches us, and quietly tells us to make our way down to the back of the store. P was about to pick a fight with the lady and ask her what's her problem and all, when she told us that there was an armed robbery in progress. YIPES... anyways at the back of the store, we find all the rest of the shoppers crowding around the deli section. beside the deli section, is the door to the storage area of the supermarket, where the deliveries are made. D, P and i slowly inch our way to the door ready to bolt if necessary. C on the other hand, being a curious female, felt compelled to have a look at the robbers. the rest of us were like "are you out of your friggin' mind, woman?!?!" so there we stood at the back.

along comes a samoan guy pushing a trolley. he looked scary enough that D whispered to me "do you think he's 1 of them?" the guy was a buff specimen who looked like a bouncer and he had a bunch of chains around his neck. and then he goes "you know.. those robbers looks shit scary man!!".

at this point, D and i stare at each other with the same thought running through our minds... "and what the hell does he think he is... a teddy bear?!?!" it's almost like hearing a big and tough guy cry about how he's scared of the dark or something equally incredible. samoan dude proceeded to describe the robbers. they were wearing sweats with hoods, and they also had ski masks on so that their faces couldn't be identified. 1 was armed with a HUGE knife and the other with a shotgun. samoan pondered whether the shotgun might be fake.

anyhow, within a span of 10 min things settled down and the robbers left, and the supermarket resumed business as usual. i got my precious ass back home, safe and sound. D and i then had a double shot of bourbon to calm down our frazzled nerves.